The last 2 weeks

WARNING: This is all just venting, read at your own risk and feel free to stop at any time, but the end is happier than the beginning. :)
.
(My blog is being weird and won't let me leave a space between paragraphs so it's not all a LONG blob of a story, which explains the weird dots between them..)
.
Doesn't the picture just say it all? I started teaching on February 17 and it's been very... challenging to say the least. To start off, the original teacher had a baby so they got a sub for 6 weeks. Then the original teacher decided to take the rest of the year off but the 6 week sub couldn't continue. They hired some guy with "classroom management experience" but no math degree (ok, they're HONORS freshman, great Idaho school systems huh?). Well, he quit after 2 days because the math was "over his head," and that's a direct quote. And that's where I come in, teacher #4 in one year. So I was hired on a Friday and started Tuesday and wouldn't you know it, I was sick as sick can be on Mon, Tues and Wed. After calling every doctor I could think of (including 2 of my UNCLES and my OB, I was desperate and everyone was booked) I finally went to one of those insta-care places to find out I had a sinus infection. Fun huh? So I started teaching with no voice from a sore throat and feeling like crap after not sleeping all night for two nights since I couldn't breathe. Needless to say, I was really ready to quit after day two as well.

After I got on antibiotics I felt much better the very next day and it went a lot better... for a second. It's like a roller coaster every single day and poor Klay never knows whether he's going to get Happy Lindsey or Crying her eyes out and wanting to quit Lindsey when I pull in at night.

.

I have two sections of geometry that I LOVE. They are all very good kids that actually care about school and want to do well so I never have any trouble with them. Then I have two sections of Algebra that are good for the most part but super chatty (after all, they are all freshman). The only frustrating thing with them is that they've had 3 different teachers to try to teach them factoring, which is confusing anyway the first time you learn it, so most of them pretty much gave up and quit doing anything all together. After 2 weeks of reteaching, reviewing, about a million homework problems, and a completely failed quiz on it for most of them, I think the ones who actually care at all are starting to get it. There's still those kids who never even open their book so they have no clue where to even start, but I don't think much is going to change that. I can't MAKE them want to learn.

.

You thought my algebra pitty party was bad... I'm still going! Pre-algebra... I don't even know where to start. There's 3 special boys in that class that will never stop talking, even when I am. They make it impossible for the rest of the class to even learn. It's not just talking, it's disruptive and rude talking towards me or at each other. One day they were told to stay with me for 10 minutes at lunch for all their talking (you would not believe how impotant a 14 year old's social lunch time is to them), but of course they all just left and then had to do lunch detention ALL LUNCH with the vice principal for 5 days. They didn't like that too much. So pretty much those 3 boys make me dread everyday of teaching. I did have a break through with one of them and found out that he has grade checks and if he's not passing all his classes he goes to jail for 30 days. Once I knew that, it was easy to work out a deal where I go a little easy on him so he can actaully do well as long as he goes easy on me and doesn't be disruptive.

.

Plus, I had to catch up on grading about a million things so I was spending FOREVER after school grading and doing lesson plans. I felt like I was never seeing my family (my little baby who I had spent every day of her life with!) and even when I did see her I was just ornery.

But... things are looking better. I graded for 5 hours after school on Thursday so that's a big stress to be caught up on. So if don't have to do that all night, every night I can see Aves and Klay more after school. Another teacher has exactly the same classes I do so she's giving me all her lesson plans and tests and everything so I don't have to spend so much time on those things. I'm starting to understand the kids in pre-algebra more and just how much help they really are going to need to understand. I have a new plan with the veteran teacher if they act up they can go to her, and then the administration if needed, so I don't have to be stuck with them being disruptive and not knowing what to do. And there were actually a lot of algebra kids asking questions the last few days which means at least they get it enough to know what questions to ask.

.

I really miss staying home with Aves but am so glad it won't last forever. Some days really do go well and I don't mind it at all, but the bad days seem to outweigh the good because I never know what I'm going to get when I walk in the building in the morning. I guess I really need to change my attitude about that. (Look, my venting is already turning into some good insight here.) It really has given me a new appreciation for all that Klay does and just how tired he is when he gets home from work at night and still has to study. I realize I'm very bad at leaving my bad days at work and not bringing them home to my poor family to deal with me. It makes me terrified to send my kids to school and be exposed to all the things I hear and see. But I'm very thankful we have this as an option for right now and I know it will get better and better as the students and I settle in for the last stretch of a crazy school year for them. If you've read this far, you are a brave soul. Thanks for letting me vent, I feel better already and think I might be able to make it through Monday. :)